Tunnel

Hello Members of My Little Corner of the Blogosphere!!

It's been a few weeks since I've updated you on the latest happenings in this crazy life of mine, so I thought I'd take a few minutes and share some insights. I recently posted a thought on Face Book that says, "I live in my own little world. But it's ok, they know me here." A friend wrote back and said it must be called "Kara-ville", so I guess this is the story of life in "Kara-ville".

I've learned recently that Kara-ville is filled with twists and turns, mountains and valleys and one heck of a long tunnel. Now, I didn't see the tunnel being constructed, but I know it exists there, because I have recently come out of that tunnel and have started to see the light of day once more. Kara-ville is actually a beautiful place with gorgeous Carolina Blue skies, sunshiney days and Spring is in the air.

This tunnel was not a particularly enjoyable road to travel; however, I must share with you all that a lot of lessons have been learned while in the tunnel. I just received an email from an old friend, not old in years mind you, but old in the sense of not having seen him in several years, asking about starting a blog. It has caused me to go back in time to when I first began this blog and what its purpose was for me.

One of the first lessons you learn in any Literature class is to "know your audience". Who are you writing for? What do they want to know about what you're writing? How can you best describe for them what you want to share with them? My audience is wide-ranging: family from across North Carolina, Texas and South Carolina, Crossroads family, co-workers, Mom's office staff, people from my political life, people I've run across in various charity work I've done, etc. These people cross all socioeconomic backgrounds and are as diverse as they are special.

I've been honored that you would read, comment and most importantly pray for me as you've read these postings. In June or so of 2008 when they first began, I was quite a shattered woman: panic attacks had come back for the first time since college, I was dealing with a life-changing job loss and the hit to my self-esteem that carried with it, I was ending an almost 2 year relationship, mom was in the middle of another campaign, I had tried to burn my house down (accidentally, of course), Mom was just coming off treatment for breast cancer, gosh there was more, but I'm tired of typing!! Suffice it to say, 2008 was a year I don't really care to revisit....it was just altogether too much!

However, what I've also learned is that all the pressures of the past year sent my body into a tunnel of depression. When I--and remember this is KARA we're talking about here 'cause ya'll know me--stopped going out with friends to movies or dinners or ball games or concerts, stopped having groups in my house for dinner parties, stopped shopping, stopped making a bazillion phone calls every night to check in on friends and loved ones, I should have realized something was wrong. The sad thing about a clinical depression is that sometimes it takes an outside source to see things for how they really are.

I am so blessed to say that's happened, and that the tunnel is now passed through. Kara-ville is, once again, a beautiful place to be. Though I'm taking one day at a time, I'm also taking time to enjoy the beautiful things in life. No longer does my self-worth depend on the job I'm working at, the acheivements and accomplishments in life, whether I'll ever be a size 2 (Ha! Don't count on that one!), whether I'll find that perfect love I long for, etc. My worth comes from the fact that I simply AM. I am who I was created to be....Kara. And forgive me for the SNL reference, but I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like me!!

There have been so many lessons learned going through the tunnel, along the twists and turns and in the valleys, but as I journey along this path of life, I do believe we're called to remember the people who have helped get us where we are. You, dear readers, are part of my journey. I love each of you, and I'm blessed that you take your time to read, comment, pray and be my friend.

Do Good Things,
Kara